Words

All relationships need the kind of violent shove that a crush brings, just to get you started and push you over the hump. And then, when the energy from that shove has gone and you come to something approaching a halt, you have to look around and see what you’ve got. It could be something completely different, it could be something roughly the same, but gentler and calmer, or it could be nothing at all.

Truly Scrumptious

What do you see?
You people gazing at me.
You see a doll on a music box that's wound by a key.
How can you tell?
I'm under a spell.

again and again

words fail me all the time, i don't even feel like talking.


I can't calm down at all,
panic is what panic feels like.
Can't we just stay silent?
Speaking now seems far too violent.

truth

I've been wearing socks lately.
I never used to wear socks.

In love, once again...

I think this blog may have become a dedication to everyone i have a crush on. I honestly do not mind. These two men have stolen my heart...

have you ever...

have you ever woken up next to someone and been afraid to look at them?
not because of what you look like, or because you feel ashamed. i think the reason is that you wish they were someone else.

nat king cole

always makes me feel the way i want to feel.
what a man.
what an abosolute charmer.
such a dreamy smooth voice...lull me to sleep.

...

I expect other people to care about things, life and people as much as i do. It leads to disapoinment. I have learnt my lessons from life experiences. I have learnt to accept that other people will not feel things as i do or care as much as i do. It doesn't mean that they are bad people, but when they are such a big part of my life it hurts sometimes.

It can be tiring to change my beleifs and reactions towards things, i can create the illusion of not being upset or disapointed. But over time it dwells on me.

I just can't understand how people can make the choices they do. Have the 'friends' they have. Where have all the genuine people gone? Where has the trust gone? I feel like there is a game going on here. Not a friendly game. It's a game for cheats and manipulators. I choose not to play. I know i made the right choice. Why do people want to be a part of that?

Ignoance is not bliss.

Girl Crushes

Oh me oh my oh me oh my oh me oh my!
I think these girls are utterly adorable.
They know femininity, which is what being a lady is all about.
No trash, just pure.

feeling nostalgic

The words of the prophets are written on the subway wall.

I have been listening to Simon and Garfunkel since i was a little girl. It would always be the first CD we would play on long car trips. I have always loved listening to their beautiful harmonies.

Their music is pure genious. It's magical, it always manages to calm me down. When i listen to them it completely takes my mind away from everything around me.

Words have failed me yet again. I never thought i would have the chance to see them perform live but last night i did. It was the most amazing thing. They both just have this presence about them. They didn't even need to play their music for me to have shivers up my spine. For two men of almost 70 to sound the way they do is almost unbeleivable. You couldn't fault a thing.

I have the record of them playing a free concert in Central Park, it is amazing. I kind of wish last night was a bit more like that. Standing in the open air, everyone singing as one. Although i am content with what i experienced last night.

I feel so lucky. I will always remember it.

"Let the morning time drop all it's petals on me. Life i love you. All is groovy."

Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West

We all know the classic Wizard of Oz story and movie. I have always loved the movie, as many people do. It never even entered my mind that someone could take The Land of Oz and turn it into a dark place. It would never have occured to me that the Wicked Witch was more than a cackling old broad. She had a mother and a father. She had a deformed sister and a perfectly normal brother. She loved and lost and was cleverer than most. How did she become "evil"?

I picked up the novel Wicked and thought that it could be interesting. I haven't found a book in a long time that makes me not want to put it down. This book is genious! It is political, intense and wonderfully weird. Gregory Maguire has created an entirely different interpretation of what Oz is. He makes it serious and more complex and takes on the question of what evil really is whilst still keeping the magic alive. I wont tell too much because i really suggest that everyone read this book if you like in-depth novels.

The Wicked Witch wasn't always so wicked.

Crushing

I have a girl crush on Winona Ryder.
The Winona of the 90's was adorable. Reality Bites is such a good movie and her character is so cute and weird. I kinda wish i was her. Let's not forget she dated Johnny Depp, which in turn means she banged him on numerous occassions. I am envious. I also like the fact that she is a clepto.

Frankie

I would do anything to be wooed by this man. I have been in love with him since i was a little girl.

I am very careful when i choose biographies to read. You have to choose one that isn't bias and shows all points of view. You can tell by reading the first page of a biography as to whether it is well written or not.

I found the perfect one for Frank and after reading it i realised that he was an asshole on most occasions, but he was also a truly remarkable human being.

He new how to treat the ladies, even though he wasn't always faithful you have to admit he knew exactly what they wanted to hear and he did treat them well and always showed great affection. Ava Gardener was the lady who stole his heart and they were both as crazy as each other, but alas when love is that insane it rarely works out. He was left heartbroken for the rest of his life.

On countless occasions he showed his disbeleif in racism and he greatly admired many black performers and considered them greater than himself.

He lived a life of crime, love, music and art. It made him the legend he is.

At the end of his days he admitted he did things that were bad. At times he was a bad person. I beleive he was one of those people who was too intense. He was too much for himself to handle let alone anyone else. That's what made him brilliant, he felt things to the extreme.

Hazy Days

It's like hazy days.

All the flowers, they would sit and talk to me for hours.

True

It's what you do to the people you say you love, that's what matters.

Garden Loving

I want my own garden.

Surrounded by flowers and cobblestone paths and a willow tree.
There would be a chateau and a creek that leads you to a beautiful hidden grotto.
All i would need is hundreds of books.
Little ducks would be the only company allowed without an invitation.
A perfect retreat.